Of all the stars we can't reach

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It's almost 3 in the morning now, finished our badminton session at 12 and lepak-lepak then went home by 2. Well-- whilst in the shower just now, I felt that I had to get these words down somewhere, hence, here we are.

First and foremost, I'm right now taking an Insta-break, hehe (like someone I know), cause I felt it's much necessary for the mind. The main purpose of Insta for me is to share happy (sometimes sad but mostly happy) moments, with hope that everyone seeing could also feel the same happiness. Yet, since last week, it's been agonizing to view my friends' lives update in a joyful manner. When I felt such way, then the main reason of me having social media has gone. Selfishly, I felt some of their happiness was painful for me. The feelings of why can't I be like this, like that yada yada and so on emerges. Realizing I can no longer share the same happiness with them, it's best if I take a break. Maybe only for a while, cause I already feel a bit better, well- mostly because I had many things to distract me from the sadness. One thing to be grateful for- work, the kids, the good people around me in real life and not virtually, all has been a great help for my healing.

Second of all, I've never experience heartbreak in all my life lol hahaha, so when I had one (I think), it's kinda shocking. I lost my appetite, literally didn't have the motivation to do anything, my mind always drifted afar, when I'm all by myself, I immediately feel sad and down, and macam-macam lagi lah symptoms hahaha ghisau betul, and it lasted for almost a week now. But as I said, I now feel a bit better. InsyaAllah... well, time heals.

Ugh I had so many things to tell but now I forgot everything. Well- if I ever remember I'll come back here but for now, das ist alles. Pinta saya malam ini (or pagi hehe) moga Tuhan memberi kesembuhan buat hati-hati yang sedang berduka dan meminjamkan sedikit kekuatan buat jiwa yang sedang berusaha. Moga-moga.




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